Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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