Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
How much do you charge for your Funyun and beer delivery service?
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Randomize
