a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
