there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
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its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
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Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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