so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Randomize
