we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
This is how my night is going so far. The bartender bought our last two rounds and I'm chasing a bee around the bar with a foam bat.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize