he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
false alarm, still single
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
Randomize
