You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just invented taco cereal.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize