I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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