i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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