We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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