is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Randomize
