It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
Girl, we were harassing people from the top of a building. I don't know how I got down, but I'm eating chocolate cake in my kitchen. Sall good yo.
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
