Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
My mom just called me to tell me that i dont have chlamydia. Awkward.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
