Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
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