I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
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