party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
