You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I love you. Go after that dick
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
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