omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
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