We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
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