She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
