Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
