she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
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