She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
If I come home tho and find u passed out naked in my bed with the bottle of crown empty, we're gonna have issues.
I'm sorry, I can't help the fact that I like to sleep naked, and I like booze, together it looks bad, yes.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
I've decided to take one for the team and bang the landlady for lower rent.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Randomize
