All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
my being single is dangerous.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Aka reading hardcore gay robot porn as a steady trickle of elementary schoolers walk by me every so often and im still in uniform as there councilor
Who is also still dressed up as a pirate
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
