If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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