OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
there is nothing like a happy birthday present when you wake up with a bow on your vagina.
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not