How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
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