Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
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