u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
What happened to fro yo and sex?
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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