I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize
