i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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