Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
