I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
GOOD MORNING! This is your wake up call! Just incase this text wasn't enough, I had sex on your bed last night while you were drunk hitting on my sister. Dan jizzed on your pillow! We rubbed it on both sides! Now get up and go to class!
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