yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
everytime i eat a fruit i feel like i'm eating ovaries
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Went to a date party without a date and had a threesome wooops
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
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