I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
I'm too high and old for this...
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
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