I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
Note to self: dont wear a butt plug for several hours and then go gym and try and do squats
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
