I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize