I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
