I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
We had everything under control until this one jackass fucked up. Thanks, Peter.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
