we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
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