I should be sponsored by Trojan
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I am waking up at 7am to go to church with him and his family... I better get eaten out tonight.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
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