the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
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then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
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She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
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