is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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