I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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