So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I mean, I'd wanted to go skinny dipping, hook up with him and have sex on a beach, so last night I basically killed 3 birds with one super slutty stone.
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
My vagina is very pro this idea
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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