Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
