4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize
