Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
