Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
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What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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