Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
she pinky promised me she was 18
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
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